I have spent the last twenty years as a homemaker,

completely immersed in raising my children. While I’m beyond grateful for the opportunity and would not have chosen any other path, I admit it occasionally came at the cost of nagging feelings of what-if. 

Before I was a mother, I was a dreamer.

I had audacious goals to pursue and from time to time, when wading through endless rounds of diapers, dishes and deprivation, wondered if I had let that version of me down. If I owed her an apology. 

Well I can now confirm that it’s true what they say, and the endless merry-go-round of mothering eventually slows, then stops spinning altogether. I’m 43, and the nest has begun to empty. My oldest is away at college; her youngest sibling on the verge of middle school. 

The thing that has surprised me most about this next phase of life has been that the dreams I set aside twenty years ago are mostly still there.

They didn’t stomp off angrily like I imagined, vowing never to return. Instead, I have found them to be patiently waiting, albeit a little dusty, until I followed through with my commitment. 

In welcoming back these dormant ambitions however, I find myself unsure of what to do with them. 

I’m not as young as I used to be, and constantly reminded that milestones are to be achieved by a certain age.

It’s too late to make the Forbes 30 under 30 list. Joan of Arc was only 17 when she led the French army to victory; the same age Kylie Jenner when she trademarked the lipstick that would make her a billionaire by 21. 

(Go ahead, take all the time you need to forgive me for using Joan of Arc and Kylie Jenner in the same analogy.) 

My answer came in the form of a poem. Specifically, two lines from The Ghost in the Picture Room by Adelaide Anne Proctor, written in 1859, that seemed to jump off the page and usher me into the next chapter of life. She said -

No star is ever lost we once have seen

We always may be what we might have been. 

We always may be what we might have been. 

The Forbes 30 under 30 list might have an age cap, but our dreams don’t. They don’t ask how old we are, just how willing. 

Inspired by this perspective, I’ve spent quite a bit of time lately down the rabbit hole of women who have pursued or achieved their dreams at, as they say, a certain age. 

Turns out there are quite a few advantages to not being in your 20s. Gen Z may be better than me at contouring and far more hydrated but, as Kathy Bates said in Fried Green Tomatoes, I’m older and I have more insurance.

I’m also more confident in my 40’s. I’ve learned invaluable lessons over the past decades, and am well past feeling like I need to justify my perspective. 

So here is a list for anyone who needs a little inspiration, or has wondered if it’s too late. Spoiler alert: It never is. 

Estee Lauder was 38-years old when she began mixing beauty creams in her kitchen, which were delivered by her son on his bicycle. From there, she branched out by traveling across the country by train to department stores, where she was met with rejection after rejection. Still, she persisted. Last year, the company that resulted reported sales of $17 billion. 

Laura Ingalls Wilder was 44 when she first began writing for small farming publications. She didn’t begin her first novel until her 60’s and published her first book, Little House in the Big Woods, at 65. I’m proud to have been raised on Little House on the Prairie, minus the episode where Mary’s baby died in a fire at the blind school, which haunts me to this day. 

Vera Wang started designing wedding dresses at age 40, and earned her first fashion award at 43. Now 73, she is still designing dresses, I assume for people who don’t want to wear a $30 wedding dress from the Salvation Army, like I did. 

Ina Garten, having never attended cooking school or even worked in a restaurant, published her  first cookbook at 51, and debuted her Food Network show at 54. If you have never made her coconut cupcakes, please stop reading and make them now. Seriously. Why are you still here? 

And speaking of,

Julia Child enrolled in cooking school at 37, published her first cookbook at 49 and began her TV show at 51. My favorite Julia Child recipe? “Get good and loaded and whack the hell out of a chicken. Bon appetit.” 

Oldest woman to compete in the Olympics? 70.
Oldest female astronaut to go into space? 82. 
The oldest woman to complete a marathon, 92.
Oldest active female pilot, 99. 

The oldest woman living today is 115. Maybe by 115 I’ll admit that it’s too late to start something new. 

But I hope not.